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  1. #1
    Senior Member

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    How to Treat A lady

    Before you read this, note: I did not make this. I don't know who did, but I noticed people are telling me I didn't make this, and that is true. I posted this so you guys could have some entertainment.


    HOW TO TREAT A LADY:
    19 things you should always remember

    1. When she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes and girls love that.

    2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (Or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

    3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

    4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say you better be. Repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.

    5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement and every girl needs some improvement.

    6. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them, because jewelry is for wieners and Asian ladies.

    7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "i hate you" and grab the other girls butt. Girls love competition.

    8. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames.

    9. Warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... Then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop horsing about the cold right now you're going to be with a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear.

    10. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

    11. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always fine stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?
    12. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.
    13. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy
    14. Give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. but not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.

    15. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

    16. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This way she'll think you're mysterious.

    17. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

    18. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but I think it's funny.

    19. If shes mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a a special suprise. NOw she'll be really excited. Now don't call.

  2. #2
    Veteran Enthusiast Android's Avatar

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    Re: how to Treat A lady

    true true...
    [center:35dbpjta]Stop looking at my sig do something useful.[/center:35dbpjta]

  3. #3
    Senior Member ben.'s Avatar
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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    lol. just lol.
    [center:1yrtbv9l][/center:1yrtbv9l]
    [center:1yrtbv9l]^^Thread^^[/center:1yrtbv9l]

  4. #4
    Veteran Enthusiast Slashed's Avatar



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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    Haha, that was actually really good.

    Nice work

    Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to beat on my girlfriend until she realises all of her faults...

  5. #5
    Fanatic Enthusiast El Lobo's Avatar

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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    Nice that stuff made me laugh
    Did you make those up yourself?
    [center:s0gvfw74][/center:s0gvfw74]

  6. #6
    Veteran Enthusiast Kyle's Avatar


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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    That was pretty good I laughed at a few
    [center:17tuwg7l][/center:17tuwg7l]

  7. #7
    Fanatic Enthusiast Alcyone's Avatar

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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    i think i get it? It's the complete opposite of how to treat a lady, right?
    [tn=560:1296vzj9]http://www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Kris/makeover2.png[/tn:1296vzj9]

  8. #8
    Veteran Enthusiast Yadda's Avatar


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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    I realized this was a joke when I hit #2

    I laughed at a few, nice work xP


  9. #9
    Enthusiast MrBond's Avatar

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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    This is great, but why did you remove 20?

  10. #10
    Senior Member

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    Re: How to Treat A lady

    I never made a 20


 
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