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  1. #1
    Liberty Phish DaniŽl's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Netherlands
    Posts
    5,507

    Breezy's Literature - Raise your fist.

    Breezy's Literature

    Raise Your Fist

    People crying and dying,
    it happens every day.
    It's an opinion delay,
    no-one is hearing their pray.

    Blaming the system for spilling them inside,
    blaming the system for killing them, that's right.
    Corruption and pain, it's everywhere miles wide.
    And sometimes it's just necessary to fight.

    The solution is short,
    the oppressed on one board.
    If you have a voice, than you use it,
    got a fist than you bruise it.
    Got command, you refuse it.

    We've got to fight for ourselves,
    to get to the right to ourselves.

    Sometimes, just disobey,
    so raise your fist and say;
    this isn't going this way!

    The Day After
    [spoiler:18fao86t]The Day After

    A broken bottle on the floor,
    a little burst through the front door.
    Big love marks all over the bed,
    a table with some rests of meth.

    A condom swimming in the pool,
    some splinters of a broken stool.
    An empty bag Doritos chips,
    a girl with puke over her lips.

    Smirnoff empty to the last drop,
    bikini girl without a top.
    A plastic sack with colored pills,
    an open fridge that gives you chills.

    An open bottle Vodka lime,
    a cracked clock giving the wrong time
    In the corner there's whisk and broom,
    I'll start the cleaning in my room.[/spoiler:18fao86t]

  2. #2
    Enthusiast Gradus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Thank you Camel
    Posts
    2,271

    Re: Breezy's Literature - Raise your fist.

    I enjoyed your first lit, is a bit cliche for saying whe have to fight and things like that, but I liked some of your sentences.
    And the another one I liked too, is a simple event, I mean, nothing unnatural, but you describe the things in an interesting way.


 

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